My regret. My heartache.
At 2:52 PM on
Saturday, August 27, 2005
我知道故事不会太曲折
我总会遇见一个什么人
陪我过没有了他的人生
成家立业之类的等等
他做了他觉得对的选择
我只好祝福他真的对了
爱不到我最想要爱的人
谁还能要我怎样呢我爱的人不是我的爱人他心里每一寸都属于另一个人他真幸福幸福得真残忍让我又爱又恨他的爱怎么那么深我爱的人他已有了爱人从他们的眼神说明了我不可能每当听见她或他说「我们」就像听见爱情永恒的嘲笑声Just what is it I want? Knowing he will never ever be mine again so why am I still thinking about it? Someone wake me up pls.
By,
CarysMummy
Only heaven knows.
At 1:44 PM on
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
I've made a confession. Maybe a confession I shouldn't even have brought up. Yes I shouldn't have. Been thinking things through and found myself silly. All these should have been kept within and left unsaid. Why did I allow them to come out? I made the wrong move.
There is this thing that I guess noone knows. Something really ridiculous. So much so that I don't even understand it myself. All these while I've been searching my heart and even till now, in the deepest point in my heart, there is always a place for ivan. I do not know why this lasted for so long but truth is I still have him in my heart. I know very well it's stupid but this is something I can't control and I can't deny and I won't hide. For now and the future, I'd have to work doubly hard to minimize the space he occupied or even to empty it. I hope that won't be long before I really succeed. I need someone else's help definitely. Bring me out, pls.
As for you, maybe things would have been better left unsaid. Yes I'm wrong this time. The outcome ultimately I have decided to leave them all to God. God decides the man for me, decides the path I will take and I'll take whatever comes. I shall await instructions. Patiently.
By,
CarysMummy
错过了就不会回来?
At 7:31 AM on
Saturday, August 20, 2005
I wanted so much to get the cd Ms Mak set her eyes upon at Marina Square last Friday for her. The earliest I could go down was Wednesday as I have no school. So I happily head down to Marina Square thinking I should be able to get the cd since we saw it only a few days ago. I couldn't remember the name but should be able to recognise it the moment I see it. Remembered the row and location it was last seen. Happily reached there but to my surprise, the entire area was empty! Where are all the cds we saw that night!? I searched other shelves and pulled out each and every cd to look at e cover but still couldn't find it. Searched through the same cds for a good 4 times to make sure I didn't miss any. Still I couldn't find it. Left with a great sense of disappointment. After that I thought to myself, we really got to grab all chances and opportunities and never let the things we like slip past just like that. Once we miss the chance it's hard to come by again. I regretted not buying it on e very same day we saw it. Was thinking of giving her a surprise but who knows I've just missed it. Many times in life we face such circumstances and consequences will always be disappointment and regret. Just when will I learn to be decisive and fight for what I want? Can the same thing apply to relationships with people? If I were to remain passive and not do anything, will I eventually live to regret? Knowing he's just so near and yet I chose not to fight for it. Will I be writing the same thing all over again on the day he slips past? The same moral applies?
By,
CarysMummy
Sob..
At 11:59 AM on
Saturday, August 06, 2005
Went to extract 2 of my teeth today. The pain is quite unbearable. It's driving me crazy and forcing my tears..
By,
CarysMummy
Jasmine yearns to be kinder.
At 12:00 PM on
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
I wish I can be like Eunice. After a chat with her, she indeed made me feel small in comparison. I feel so ashamed of myself. Why can't I learn to look at things from other people's point of view first before passing my judgement? Why can't I analyse things with an unbiased heart first before condemning someone? Why can't I be less critical? After listening to her, her way of thinking, her way of looking at things, her way of choosing how to live her life and her ability to accept people for who they are, for all these, I salute her. Her words struck me hard. Made me realise what a loser I am. Although this thing in me is hard to change, I will still try my best. To live life happily each day, bearing no grudges. This is how I'm gonna live my life.I wish I know what you're thinking or know that you're not thinking of anything and that everything is just wishful thinking on my part. Tell me if i'm just thinking too much cos I hate to be guessing how you feel.
By,
CarysMummy
At 9:34 PM on
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
My classmates!
By,
CarysMummy
At 9:33 PM on
BDEFT gals!
By,
CarysMummy
Jasmine