167 days left..

At 1:01 AM on Monday, June 30, 2008

Those were the happy moments I once had with them. Although they kept flashing back repeatedly, I know life goes on. I didn't expect myself to miss life there so much. Just going to the toilet reminds me of the times I intercomed Zann, 'eh toilet ai mai?', going for dinner with colleagues reminds me of strict one hr lunch with Alice and the other lunch mates, reading email reminds me of the few names that pops up in my email, 'cw chooi, ps kon, zann chua, alice tan, joanne tiah, cheryl khoo, jj tan etc', the stationery cabinet reminds of how i packed and stock take the stationery, even watching Jap shows reminds me of my Jap bosses and many others. DISCO times are indeed wonderful. If only it had more prospects and more things to learn and do, it'd be a great place to be in. Come to think of it, in that less than a yr, I did quite a lot of things with them. Went for the bkk company trip, company xmas dinner, disco olympics events, Semicon show, gotta to know zann, had alot of fun together, went Penang to look for colleagues, made valuable friendships with KL and Penang colleagues, and many other crazy things we do and countless jokes we cracked. So many laughter and happy moments all in that merely a yr. I seriously miss every single one of those greatly.

Not only those, recently i have no idea why i started to miss so many things and people all of a sudden. Many past events all started to flow back one by one. As I browse through friendster and facebook, and when I see each one of my frens, different memory comes back. The list of people i miss is just far too long. I really dunno what's wrong with me.

And i'm gonna miss dear so so so so so much in the next 2 weeks. He's going for 2 weeks reservist later at 730am and it'll be a long 2 weeks before i get to see him again. And i'm already missing him now. =(

By,
CarysMummy

170 days left..

At 4:51 PM on Friday, June 27, 2008

To continue or not? I felt quite bad when dear finally told me the truth. He told me he's really tired and it's no joke. He has been staying up waiting for me till i get home and give him a msg every night ever since i started work. Mum has also been staying up till i get home and till she hears the door lock. I just heard her told doc that she hasn't been slping well lately, slping at 2 plus and waking at 5 plus. I've not seen nor talked to dad the entire week. This is really getting unhealthy. I finally broke down and cried last night in dear's arms. Thinking back at those wrong choices i made really upsets me. For now, rejecting Millenia's offer is the greatest thing in my head now. Sigh. I know I shouldn't be looking back.

Went to have my foot treated. Doc say it's due to my crooked backbone that is pressing down on my foot and exerting strength on the wrong place causing a swell in the bone and causing the abnormal blood circulation. Something like that and it's all interlinked. Now what I need to do is go for accupuncture to improve blood circulation and eat stuff that will strengthen my lungs and other organs. According to the doc, if the condition doesn't worsen, it's considered as cure as there is no cure to this. Just make sure it doesn't worsen. Had a round of accupuncture just now. Really painful man.

By,
CarysMummy

171 days left..

At 10:51 AM on Thursday, June 26, 2008

Had dinner at Cafe Cartel with my dept peeps last night. They are a bunch of easy to get along young people all in their 20s. The amazing thing is among them, there's one who looks like Da gong, one who looks like Zhoulin, one who looks like Diyou and one who looks like Ernest!! I'm not exaggerating but they are really splitting images of them!! The way they talk, think, facial expression, way of doing things and even some physical characteristics. That's really amazing! There are still some others whom i feel are familiar. Just still can't figure out who they look like. Haha. Interesting.

Although this bunch of people isn't as warm as the Disco aunties and engineers, isn't as sweet and caring as Phoebe and Andrea, but they are definitely much much better than OCBC's not as friendly people. And till now, I discovered I can get along quite well with them and they are actually very nice people! A pity Ben will be leaving soon. Feels quite lost without a leader.

Btw, Ben's my team leader as well as my mentor. He dragged a chair, sat next to me last night to have a casual talk with me. He asked about how i'm adapting to the hrs and the crucial qn. If they think I'm good and were to convert me to perm just after 3 mths, will I accept it? I guess my ans was rather obvious to him. The boss will get feedback from him about me. Wonder how will that affect me. Will they decide to terminate my contract since I won't stay even after 6 mths? Will Ben just tell Boss that?

On a side note, I feel really good getting compliments from them. First from Ben, and one after another from my team mates who taught me. A little sense of achievement there.

By,
CarysMummy

173 days more..

At 10:23 AM on Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Having bird's nest the moment you wake up in the morning is quite a shiok thing. Now i'm enjoying my bird's nest while blogging.

Today is Day 7. Work is significantly getting tougher. Many more complicating ideas to squeeze into that peabrain of mine. Not that I'm stupid and can't understand. In fact i'm amazed by myself how i can understand those and even ask intelligent questions. If only I'm like that during schooling days then probably I'd have fared better. The old me's always too afraid to ask and everything goes past that head of mine without processing. It's a miracle how I survived till now actually. That aside, though i'm willing to put in extra hard work now, those are afterall not my cup of tea. Interest rate swaps, buy and call options, premium, notional amt, rate fixing, debit, credit, accrual and other related matters, these are things that I thought i'd left it with RMIT and never will take them back again. And now i'm facing all of them, familiar but not quite familiar again. Thinking of all these again, naturally linked me with regrets again. This time I have a rather big regret. I regret rejecting the Millenia offer. But well, life is full of regrets but impt thing is to be able to leave them behind and move on! I will be able to do it!

Dear is right. This job is wearing everyone out. I know it. I'm still trying to adapt too. It's ok, I'll be looking out for opportunities during this time. For the good of everyone.

By,
CarysMummy

174 days more..

At 11:20 AM on Monday, June 23, 2008

It's the start of the week again. Weekends always passes many times faster than weekdays because I was really happy and happy times passes really fast. Why i was happy because i had dear by my side. But i refused to feel upset going to work because that's not gonna help anything. I wanna just remain happy to see what's there in store for me. Praying for a smooth week ahead. And smooth 6 mths ahead.

By,
CarysMummy



At 9:04 PM on Saturday, June 21, 2008

Oh ya before the day ends,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY 大哥!!!

By,
CarysMummy



At 1:01 AM on

Finally survived the week. Getting happier day by day. I'm definitely much happier today than i was in Day 2. I attribute this to mentality and the way i see things now. I realised that changing my mentality towards this whole issue did help a great deal in adapting to my work life now. Time passes easier and I'm feeling less unhappy. No doubt I did have some regrets leaving DISCO, but I take it as a learning process for me as well. I'm not saying that I want to or hope to go back there now. Just that at times i'll think about it and feel that life back then was really relaxing and all. Nothing is perfect in this world. Although I can take my own sweet time for dinner now, I miss having lunch with Alice and the rest. Although I have the flexibility of reporting for work/leaving office now, I miss the 530 sharp dismissal i used to have to see my dear. Although I have relatively more difficult things to do now, I still miss doing nothing and chatting around with warmer and friendlier colleagues. Human beings are indeed hard to satisfy.

But at the end of the day, everything that happened is a learning process for me. From joining DISCO to having stayed for almost a year to leaving DISCO and now to having joined Citi, I had different thoughts about how I wanna lead my life. As usual, the indecisive side of me is always controlling me. This moment this and next moment that. I used to be very upset over wrong decisions made but now i've learnt not to take things too seriously and not be too hard on myself. Still in the process of changing and adapting.

On a side side note, my colleagues just told me that they put on weight working this shift. Oh no!! I dun wanna put on weight! Imagine a fat and shag looking Jasmine! Noooooooooooo!! Ben says I'll start slping late and waking up later than before. I'll have problems slping at night and my bioclock will go haywire. Hmm, probably i'm feeling a little of those symptoms already. Ok, only 6 mths it shall be!

Surprisingly I'm blogging more often given my working hrs now.

By,
CarysMummy



At 10:33 AM on Friday, June 20, 2008

Finally the last day of the week. Seriously can't wait for the weekends.

Some good things about my job now. Firstly, alot of flexibility. I don't have to start work on time and go back on time. Meaning I can start late and end early as long as i complete my work. Secondly, dinner break can be quite long. For eg last night, we left office for dinner at 7, finished eating ard 730 and headed to la kopi and they mentioned it's still early and there's another hr to slack. It's really relaxing not having to rush back to office. I'll add on if i think of any along the way.

Got my cabcharge card yesterday. Cashless trips are much more convenient.

I realised i prefer jobscope that are fixed and specific.

By,
CarysMummy



At 11:51 AM on Thursday, June 19, 2008

Can only blog in the morning for the next 6 mths. Yes only for 6 mths. I've decided that i'll not continue after my contract ends cos it's getting unhealthy not only for myself but my family and dear. I've not seen my dad for 3 whole days, mum's slping as late as when i get home and dear coming to pick me at such hr and rushing to meet me for dinner. Given that i'm such a family person, I should have thought about the possible problems beforehand. Not that I did not, but i'm just attracted by other incentives. This goes to show that to me, family is still my topmost priority.

Work's still pretty fine. Still learning the ropes but it's getting more complicated. Mentor says the stuff that i learnt in these 3 days are stuff that he learnt in 1 mth. Imagine that. Wonder how much more can my peabrain take. So far so good and I've received compliments from him! At least there's a little sense of achievement as of now. Like what jie said, I'll still put in my heart in this job until 6 mths later then I shall decide further.

Thankfully there's many happy things I can look forward to and that's going to keep my days going. There'll be the Malaysia sale shopping and genting with all my dearest this coming Aug, the arrival of my darling nephew xiao gengen in Nov, and the latest news now is The Arrival of dear's niece/nephew in Feb next yr! Congrats Yiwen Jiejie!! Our dads really have similar fate. Not only knew each other for over 40 yrs, Same time dated our mothers, same time got married, same time gave birth to our sisters, we're of the same age, my sis & ur bro 1 yr diff, same yr our sisters got married and now same time they're gonna be grandpas!! It's just so coincidental!

The biggest thing i'm looking forward to is of course spending the rest of my life with my beloved. It's just unbelievable and amazing! That is the most impt thing that kept me going in my work as I know for sure things will just get better.

By,
CarysMummy



At 11:57 AM on Wednesday, June 18, 2008

17th June 2008. My 23rd birthday. I accepted his proposal at the highest point in Singapore Flyers. Status changed.

A pleasant surprise. He came to pick me up the night before at my workplace and stayed over at my place. He did not wish me happy birthday or showed any signs of wanting to give me a surprise. I got quite angry and didn't talk to him the whole night. (After verification, he just wanted to quickly sleep and can't wait for the morning to come so that he can carry out his plan) He told me he's gonna bring me to suntec for lunch. I didn't suspect anything amiss. (His trick worked) But when he didn't turn into suntec, I knew he's up to something. And i was right, the Singapore Flyers. He made reservations for signature cocktail. We were treated VIP, express boarding and a whole cabin to ourselves. (He silently heaved a sigh of relief as he didn't know how he can propose with so many other people in the same cabin)

He did it. I was pleasantly surprised and touched. Thanks dear! For this wonderful surprise and celebration. It must have been quite a headache for you. Love you lots and so looking forward to our new life ahead together.











By,
CarysMummy



At 10:13 PM on Sunday, June 15, 2008

Had a joint celebration for Papa's day and my birthday. This time round was at Mushroom pot. Food's great and company's great except that ahboy couldn't join us. I've always love being together with the whole family with noone being left out. I love you all my dearest. Thanx for the celebration!




By,
CarysMummy



At 3:42 PM on Saturday, June 14, 2008

Finally ended with DISCO. Many mixed feelings actually. Not sure if I'll meet nice people, not sure if i can be cope with the job, not sure about my social life etc etc. Anyway, there's no rooms for regrets now. Whatever it is, I can only look forward and strive on. I'll be starting my career with Citibank on mon. Rather excited as well as worried. I hope all will be well.

Went on a 3D2N trip to genting and sunway with mum, sis and aunt. Genting's weather's great and sunway's shopping splendid! Met up with Kon and Lim and went to watch them play a friendly bball match followed by supper. Just watching them play brought back many fond memories and it's indeed a nice experience to watch a bball match in a sch in a foreign country at 9pm. Did some shooting after the match ended. I still miss sac bball days very much.











By,
CarysMummy



At 9:04 PM on Thursday, June 05, 2008

I'm back again! Gone for not too long right? :P

Anyway, I just want to rant about this bitch at my workplace. She's !@#$%^&!!! ARGH!! She made me so angry (probably one of the angriest time during this whole yr at this workplace) that I felt my intestines and lungs and all other organs were all mixed up and not in place momentarily. I'm not exaggerating really! She's such a bitch that I so want to scream and slap her in the face. Even my colleague sitted at the far end of the office could feel the fire burning over at my end. And it's the first time I flared up, shouted, quarrelled and stormed out of the office slamming the door behind me. Now when I talk and think about it, I'm still very angry and upset! IDIOTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!

On a lighter note, went for a couple of interviews already but coincidentally all from the same bank. And going for interviews and meeting people has become a part of me already that now i'm so experienced and prepared. I talk with much more confidence to big shots now which i'm really glad. I think I fared the best for today's interview. No hiccups, no tongue tight, no questions i cannot answer. Personally feel i did well but the rest is still up to them. They can still give me excuses such as i'm over-qualified (that was one reason i got and i was stunned!) for not wanting me Even if i dun get selected i'm still happy and satisfied with my performance today. =) But of cos i'll hope i get selected cos it's a good close to $800 pay increase. Well, just have to wait for their reply. *Good news please come*

By,
CarysMummy