Only heaven knows.

At 1:44 PM on Tuesday, August 23, 2005

I've made a confession. Maybe a confession I shouldn't even have brought up. Yes I shouldn't have. Been thinking things through and found myself silly. All these should have been kept within and left unsaid. Why did I allow them to come out? I made the wrong move.

There is this thing that I guess noone knows. Something really ridiculous. So much so that I don't even understand it myself. All these while I've been searching my heart and even till now, in the deepest point in my heart, there is always a place for ivan. I do not know why this lasted for so long but truth is I still have him in my heart. I know very well it's stupid but this is something I can't control and I can't deny and I won't hide. For now and the future, I'd have to work doubly hard to minimize the space he occupied or even to empty it. I hope that won't be long before I really succeed. I need someone else's help definitely. Bring me out, pls.

As for you, maybe things would have been better left unsaid. Yes I'm wrong this time. The outcome ultimately I have decided to leave them all to God. God decides the man for me, decides the path I will take and I'll take whatever comes. I shall await instructions. Patiently.

By,
CarysMummy